All pierced people look the same

By Vera | September 20, 2010




A gig last week

Originally uploaded by Verabug

Last week I had a gig that I had known about for a few months. I was hired to do crystal ball readings at a fundraiser at the Ritz Carlton in Half Moon Bay. There were four of us readers total, and each one of us used a different tool.

The clientele was lovely but from a very different demographic than me: mostly married with children, suburban, older than me, and probably in a higher tax bracket. I did feel connected to a couple of the ladies though, and one of them said to me: “I have to tell you something. You remind me of the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.” I took it as a compliment.

I can be a good model sometimes

By Vera | September 13, 2010






Originally uploaded by Verabug

I just had my second shoot with Selene Gibbous of Gibbous Fashions. I am much happier with the results than those of the first one we did earlier this year. Selene did my hair and dramatic make-up and put me in two different outfits. The shoot was part just for fun and glamour, and part to have some photos of items for sale in her online shop. She also fitted me for two new dresses we are going to shoot with in the future.

I am very pleased with what we created together.

Longing for closeness with strangers

By Vera | September 3, 2010




Aras, me, Vytas
Originally uploaded by Verabug

It’s the week of Burning Man: The man burns tomorrow. I am not there. It’s the first year since 2005 I have skipped. It was a conscious decision to skip this year. I didn’t buy any tickets in January, and every month since then I have thought “I am not going this year.” It felt good, like a relief. Kean felt the same way, which made the decision feel even better to me. Kean started school a few weeks ago, which would have made it difficult for him to go anyway.

Jeremy had finals this week and wasn’t sure if he was going to go either. But he decided to go just for the weekend. He left yesterday. I entertained fantasies for a while of going with him, but neither of us worked very hard at making this happen. So I didn’t go.

I have been looking at photos from past years today. I came across this photo, which I had almost forgotten about. It’s from 2007. Pictured with me are two brothers from Los Angeles, whom I got to know for a week and then never saw again. Recognizing in the photo the familiarity I had with them made me feel nostalgic. That’s my rented van V is sitting in. There is my water, my lotion, my Hello Kitty storage box, my trash bag. There are my friends.

I miss my friends, all the near-strangers I ever made a deep connection with, whether it was for five minutes or for several hours.

Swirly dreams

By Vera | September 1, 2010

When I was younger I had a friend named Kathi. Her full name was Wera-Katharina (Wera being pronounced the same way as my name, Vera). She went by Kathi because she didn’t like the name Wera. She also said “There is no beautiful way to write Wera or Vera.” I believed her. But I did feel grateful that my name was spelled with a V instead of a W because I thought that the V looked prettier. Plus, I had seen this French teen romance movie called La Boum, in which a boy is in love with a girl named Vic and writes the letter V over and over again in his notebook. That’s when I started fantasizing that one day a boy would do the same for me, with the V representing my name.

Two years ago I saw the movie Elizabeth, in which Cate Blanchett signs a document with her name and very intricate swirly patterns beneath it. I was deeply impressed. Around the same time I got my first swirly tattoo, and I started noticing all the swirly metal gates, doors and windows in San Francisco. Even the gate and stair railing at my building have metal swirls, but I had never noticed them before. Suddenly I was in love with swirls and felt a desire to contribute to the swirly beauty in the world.

I decided that perhaps I could take a calligraphy class. I looked online and found a place that teaches locally, but the class I wanted wasn’t going to be until a few months later. By the time the class started, I was broke and had no budget for any classes. I was lucky if I could pay for rent and food. When another few months later I had money again, I decided to buy a bunch of markers and some really smooth black pens and start drawing swirls instead. This phase didn’t last long. I have never been all that interested in drawing and always been much more passionate about writing. I started decorating birthday cards and letters with swirls but when it came to writing the “To …” part, I wanted to know: How do I make the letters pretty? How do I make the T swirly in a way that looks like I know what I’m doing?

I don’t know what finally came over me – divine feminine energy perhaps – but on Saturday I actually went to an art store and got myself some black ink, a calligraphy pen and a cursive font book.

And for the rest of the weekend I spent hours and hours practicing swirly letters. I felt really fired up and inspired. The Chopin script quickly became one of my favorites because it is especially swirly. I mean, look at that A! Look at that N! They are little works of art.

The page in the book on Boulevard Script is another one I really appreciate because in addition to giving you the alphabet, it also shows you how to make lower case letters a little prettier if they appear at the end of a word. I adore the ornamental swoops at the end of the lower case k, z, etc. And I really like the upper case S. I have been practicing that one a lot by writing the name “Sue” over and over again. I can’t wait to write my rent check later today because I get to address the envelope to Skyway Realty.

I went through the entire book, found a font I liked and then practiced my favorite letters from that font. I hope to come up with my very own cursive font which takes inspiration from a variety of the fonts from the book. In the Vivaldi Script I found my favorite V. Another great thing about this book is that it includes a bunch of other ornamental swirls, for instance the heart on the Vivaldi Script page. I have spent hours practicing drawing that heart. I am almost there.

I fell in love with the swoop included on the page for Snell Roundhand. I want to marry it or at least use it a lot in my own handwriting. So far I have to fill it in manually but hope to eventually get a different pen that can draw thin and broad strokes. In fact, I have already emailed Sabrina Ward Harrison and asked her what kind of pen and ink she uses. She really inspires me in that she has created her very own signature cursive font, which is gorgeous, and which obviously uses one of those fountain pens that can draw think and broad strokes. I hope she gets back to me soon.

One page in the book even shows you how to prettify commas and periods by adding a swoop or swirl after them. I like this. Maybe I’ll use it next time I write my return address when paying a parking ticket: “San Francisco *comma* *swoop* CA 94110″.

So I finally practiced writing my name over and over, especially with the V from the Vivaldi Script. I think it looks beautiful, and 20 years later I feel like I can finally say that Kathi was wrong. There are beautiful ways to write the name Vera. Look at it. Doesn’t this make you want to fall in love with someone named Vera?